Richard Jarvis: not a fan of motorists or lace-up shoes
If you think that’s bad, what do you reckon about the plight of the poor metal-encased, combustion-powered travellists in Croydon? Not only do the perpetually suffering unfortunates have to live in Croydon, but it appears that they are also being prevented from driving wherever they like. Croydon Bastard Council has made the frankly ridiculous decision to pedestrianise the busy market on Surrey Street from 5am to 8pm every day, even on Sundays when no stalls are out. Despite there being clear signage on both sides of the road to this affect, hundreds of distracted drivers are making the easy mistake of steering their automobiles down the road during the prohibited times and being slapped – not literally it must be assumed – with a whopping £65 fine. Madness. One such victim was displeased-looking Robert Vanson who raged, “I drove in from the bottom end by Church Street. I never saw the sign.” Who looks at street signs anyway? It later emerged that Croydon drivers have had virtually no warning of the car ban, with it only being advertised in the local press and on street signs, as well as Surrey Road being a motor vehicle free zone only since April 2000. Come on Croydon, give them a chance.
Mr Vanson has had to sell his shirt buttons to pay the fine
Local businessman Richard Hough has become so concerned about the evil bollard that he has taken to standing beside it with his mouth open to warn unwitting drivers
And if the police, with their peerless driving skills, are being caught out, what chance do the rest of us have?